So, we finally decided it was the right choice to send the kiddos to school for a "trial run"....and then I went for the day. They set up a visitation in the Kindergarten class for us and I took J to experience a day in the life of his future. It wasn't bad. It wasn't all that great either.
Ultimately, I was left with a sinking feeling. J was pretty indifferent and I was pretty sure he'd love it and want to go back...so that threw me off. But, the biggest concern I had was that all of the talk to encourage the kids to be "good people" leaves behind the idea that when you don't rise up to those stipulations you become a "bad person". Now...no one was calling the kids bad. There was, however, a lot of "good friends don't xyz" or "we don't ever play bad guys because our friends are not negative", etc. All well-intentioned comments to be sure...I am just not sure that my little guy, having been raised the way he has thus far, wouldn't internalize the flipside to these corrections. The last thing I want is to send him "away" to doubt his integrity.
Perhaps I need to step back and realize that my instinctive parenting style works for us and it's just not conducive to swimming down the main stream. This isn't always the easiest way to go, but I just know when something is not right...sometimes it takes putting it right in my face...but I know.
I am going to bed now...to ponder how I am going to homeschool 2 kids in the fall :)
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